Whenever I feel out of balance, it’s usually because I’m not trusting myself.
I’ve stopped looking for the answers that reside within my doubts and questions.
I’ve lost touch with my inner compass – the one that knows I’m in the right place, even when my mind is scrambling and lost.
I’ve forgotten that I have the character and abilities to meet the challenges of any experience I’m currently facing. (Something I’ve proved time and time again, and forgotten – in equal measure).
Why is self trust so important?
As young children, most of us are taught to have a healthy respect for authority figures. To listen to our parents, teachers and elders. We observe that certain behaviors lead to approval and fitting in, while others, do not.
Many of us learn to forsake our own wisdom, making decisions based on the opinions and expectations of the social systems we grew up in. Social systems that unintentionally pressure us to live in ways that are untrue to who we are.
I know, because I spent countless years striving for gold stars that looked a lot like approval. Buying into the idea that if I behaved well, did what was expected, avoided conflict, and did everything in my power to keep others happy, I would be liked and loved. My world would be perfect.
I stopped listening to my own convictions. I floundered with indecisiveness and equated struggle with personal failure. Self trust was a sporadic visitor.
And what I keep returning to is this – the heartfelt intelligence that we all have an inner mentor – an authentic, wiser and soothing best friend. Someone who has the potential to heal, save, and bring out a larger vision for our lives.
Leaning into yourself
Nowadays when I find myself on a roller coaster of uncertainty and distress, I lean in, and connect back to her.
She speaks to me with the quiet assurance of someone who knows that I can get through whatever darkness comes my way, that I will continue to thrive.
When I take time to commune with my wiser self, I am reminded that I don’t need to avoid pain because I will always rise above it.
All it takes is for me to reach out to her and begin a conversation.
One that starts with wondering what it is that she really wants me to know and how she might handle it.
You cannot know yet how to do something you’ve never done before; you deserve support. If you’re ready to learn how to practice radical self-care, I would be honored to support you on your journey!